glory-to-cobrastan:

shabangles:

When I start to get emotional I immediately think “I’m so gay” and this is because straight people actually don’t have emotions

this is false and heterophobic. straight people have a panorama of emotions including:

  • outrage
  • jealousy
  • Situational Benevolence (aka “don’t fight hate w/ hate”)
  • sports
  • umami, the “Fifth Emotion”
  • TGIF

(via britney2007spears)

lztybrn:

remember way back in 2006 when the wii first came out and then the entirety of the world forgot how to hold onto something with a firm grasp so much that nintendo had to make a shock absorbing condom just so that tvs wouldnt get destroyed when people would end up sending this thing flying at their tvs at 900 miles per hour

(via snorlaxatives)

unclefather:

You know what to do with that big fat butt…

Please sit down. We’re trying to get information about this murder you witnessed.